I like Cherry Jello

[Disclaimer: Blame Whit]

I saw him looking my way through those pretty lace curtains. Does he think I’m stupid enough to move his shovel when he’s looking right at me? Oh no, I am much smarter than that. I’ll move his shovel another day. I have much bigger plans. I’ll wait until he’s distracted and sneak into the laundry room. He’ll do that funny angry dance when he finds all the clothes have been turned inside out. If I have time, I might even hide his keys.

My plan seems to be working. It won’t be long until I can claim victory. Misery loves company and us shut-ins, well, we love adding to our numbers. It won’t be long before I call the people that deliver the food trays. A matter of months at the most. They always give me extra cherry Jello when I sign up someone new. I really like cherry Jello. I like to watch it wiggle and jiggle. Jello is a good thing. It makes me happy. It’s important that I stay happy.

I’m still waiting for my bras to arrive in the mail. I think the mail lady may be taking my stuff. I’m not sure why she would take my stuff. She could never fill my bras. Maybe she’s jealous. She won’t be getting any hot chocolate mix from me this year! I’ll give her oatmeal cookies instead. The ones I licked. She told me she really liked them last year.

My dogs hate the woman lives behind us. They are out there barking at her right now. I should bring them in but she’s a bitch. When we first got them I tried telling her that she needed to go to the fence and talk to them, maybe give them a treat and it would be fine. She wouldn’t do it. She said it would be ‘rewarding their behavior’. No one else seems to have a problem with their behavior. Of course everyone else went to the fence and talked to them, and gave them a treat. People create their own problems. I think a few more weeks of this incessant barking and I’ll be making a phone call for her too. It looks like 2008 might be a great year for cherry Jello.