Rock on, Jesus!

We pulled off I95 and headed down the back roads. It doesn’t take much longer and it’s way more interesting. We drove and looked at the tobacco fields on one side, they were just about ready to harvest. The other side alternated between soybeans (just starting to bloom) and cotton. It was God’s country. Seriously. We passed four Free Will Baptist Churches and an Apocalyptic church within just a few miles. Better yet, I think it was revival week. They had bouncy castles outside. I thought, ‘Bounce for the Lord, my brothers! Bounce for the Lord!’ I keep that thought to myself. You don’t say things like that in God’s country.

I was staring off over a field and looking at an old piece of farm equipment. Cotton I thought, that harvests cotton. I wondered if I could grow cotton in my back yard. I grew corn, why not? That’s when things got weird.

Suddenly MyHusband rolls down his window and starts waving like a mad man. Another church, another revival. But in addition to the bouncy castles, there was a life size plastic Jesus standing all alone in the middle of a field. The girls and I didn’t wave. We just sat there staring at MyHusband.

“You guys are so hosed! You didn’t wave to Jesus. I waved to Jesus and now I’m in with the man.”

MyHusband obviously didn’t know the rules of conduct for God’s Country.

We continued our journey and there were a few more statues of Jesus hanging out on the side of the road. This time the kids were in on the fun. It was a 60mph plastic Jesus meet-and-greet. I was starting to get hives but I was doing all right. I was doing all right until my youngest saw a Jesus made out of stone.

“Rock on Jesus!” She shouted and flashed the ‘Rock on’ hand sign. “Get it, he’s a rock!”

That’s when I realized we would not be stopping at the Piggly Wiggly on the way out of town and I thanked God when we were finally back on the Interstate.

Tags: bouncy castles, farm, god, god's country, I95, jesus, revival, rock on, travel