ImPerceptibility

Posts Tagged ‘educational’

I can’t believe the school year is almost over. Less than two months and I get to have my oldest back at home with me. I’m really looking forward to it and I’m counting down the days. She’s such a fun kid and her little sister misses her a lot more than she would ever admit to. We haven’t discussed next year but I think she’ll probably go back to public school. She’s made a bunch of friends and enjoys all her classes. Even English. She’s definitely grown up in the last year. Or maybe me not standing over her shoulder all the time gave me enough room to see that she’s growing up. It’s hard to tell about those things. I don’t have a problem with her going back to school next year. She’s happy and learning, but I’m seriously aggravated with the school system itself.  Public Schools suck!

I don’t know what the hell has happened to public schools since I was a kid but they need to get their act together. Maybe it’s all the hippyish teaching philosophies or some new educational technique but they are not on the ball. What happened to the boring classrooms with desks all in a row and mind numbing posters on the walls? What’s up with the tables and chairs. Why are these kids working together in groups? You should not have basketball playoff charts hanging on the wall! That’s what I do. I’m an educational anarchist. You are not. You are a school and you should try and look like one.

And aren’t teachers supposed to be old and have moles with hair sticking out of them. What’s up with hiring 24yo cuties to teach history. JFC! He even looks sweet in a sweater vest. Good thing my oldest isn’t into boys yet. She’d never learn a thing. The other teachers aren’t any better. Walking around smiling and interacting with the kids. I even saw one of them telling the kids jokes. You are supposed to be in the teachers lounge smoking cigarettes and complaining. This is unacceptable.

Don’t even get me started on the homework. My oldest spends about 30-40 minutes a week working on homework and she likes the projects and assignments. Creating book jackets, making her own math reference book, and building model airplanes are my territory. Your assignments need to take this form : Complete all the odd problems on page 256. Read pages 192-365 and answer the review question in complete sentences. I don’t think my oldest has even opened her Math book. Freakin’ slackers! Creative assignments have no place in a school. Get back to the books.

Don’t get me started on the extra credit projects, enrichment activities, or fun Friday. You don’t show kids movies and call it school. Educational anarchists do that. Cut it out and also stop letting them use the internet for research. Technology is not for schools. Eleven year old school children shouldn’t be making power point presentations. Playing Dance Dance Revolution in PE class is just wrong! Push-ups and running laps in the heat. Sit-ups and kick ball in the mud. Get with the program.

Then there is the bullying and violence. You guys need to step it up. She heard there was a fight one day in the cafeteria but she didn’t see it. She thinks the eigth graders sometimes fight but she’s not sure. No one has stolen any lunch money either. A fat kid did steal her snack cake out of her lunch but she left her lunchbox out in the hall and she figured it was fair game. He did leave the Cheez-its so she was okay with it. Public schools are breeding grounds for violence and bullying. I expect better!

But mostly, you need to stop making her like school. School is not fun. Get it straight. You bunch of asses. I let her go school so she would appreciate what she already had. You went and took it, then made it better. Screw you!

My only hope now is that she’ll get bored with her classes and want to come back home. Maybe take some classes at the community college in a few years. So cut out the advanced classes and that differentiated instruction crap. You want to make a mother cry, you jerks?

Educational Anarchist Logo - 2008

According to the California Teachers Union, Homeschooling leads to educational Anarchy! Ahhh run!

[Note: I created this graphic for all educational anarchists and anyone else that wants it. Share and share alike, dervived or not derived, with or without attribution, for non-commercial use :)]