ImPerceptibility

Posts Tagged ‘smoking’

It’s weird. I don’t know why but lately I’ve been wanting to smoke. It’s very disturbing for me. I haven’t smoked in years. I don’t want to smoke but I almost got in car and went to the convenience store for a pack of Marlboros the other day. It just comes out of nowhere. It doesn’t last long and it doesn’t happen often but I just can’t figure out why it happens at all.

The other day I walked by a man sitting on a bench and he was smoking. I almost stopped and asked him for a cigarette. I’m not sure what the implications of bumming a cigarette from a bum would be, but they can’t be good.

I’m not going to start smoking again. That’s a given. I like to be able to walk for hours without getting winded. I like not smelling like an ashtray. I like not running out late at night because I ran out cigarettes. I like increasing my chances of watching my future grandkids grow up. I like being a self righteous non-smoker. But right now, I would like a cigarette. I hope it passes quickly.

Hello. My name is ImPerceptible and I’m a quitter. Yep, you heard me. I’m a quitter. If you don’t believe me, I can prove it. Here’s a list.

Things I have quit:

1. Smoking – That was a nasty habit I wish I had never started.
2. Drinking until I puke – MyHusband is not an enabler. Spending the night with your face pressed against the toilet is a fast way to learn the meaning of moderation.
3. College – Three times.
4. My job – Several times.
5. Fishing – I don’t eat fish anymore and catch and release seems cruel.
6. Eating raisins and peanuts – I guess I haven’t quit this, I just haven’t done it in a long time. It’s the ultimate in salty sweet goodness.
7. Being too shy or embarrassed to ask for what I want in bed – Who knew men really like to know what you want. Even if Especially if it’s freaky.
8. Picking a fight with my husband and grabbing my pillow and blanket to go sleep on the couch just because I want him to come in there and tell me he loves me and doesn’t want to sleep without me.
9. Studying Karate and Judo – But I can still kick the hell out of something if I want to.
10. Caring what people think about me.
11. Not caring about what people think about me.
12. Cleaning my house with harsh chemicals
13. Being afraid of spiders

I’m sure there’s more. I’ll keep you posted. Any other quitters out there?